New Employee

One popular new plastic surgery technique is called lip grafting, or "fat recycling" wherein fat cells are removed from one part of your body that is too large, such as your buttocks, and injected into your lips; people will then be literally kissing ass. ~ Dave Barry

Thanks to the marvels of modern plastic surgery we have a new employee working at our school. I do not have a "before" picture, but as you can see I do have the "after" picture. So, it may seem as though I am ragging on plastic surgery, but I really don't care either way. I do have one suggestion, though. Make sure you have adequate time to heal before returning to work....especially if that work involves dealing with small children (and immature adults - yes, myself included). Coming to work with a make-up caked face in a poor attempt to cover horrible bruises is not wise. As a teacher, why have work done during Spring Break? Wait until summer so it won't be quite as obvious after the few months off. Personally, I had only seen the "work" from a distance because I know that I will end up laughing directly in the bruised, stretched tighter than a drum face staring blankly at me (since the botox has restricted normal movement). That was until this afternoon. I was alone in the workroom when "Michael" approached. There was no escape. Luckily she was wearing large, dark sunglasses so I couldn't get the full effect. She is a "space invader"....you know, one of those people who have no regard for a person's personal space. She was up in my face basically demanding to be looked at making really random small talk about how she didn't know I was good friends with Clementine (who was recently hired at school - and no, she is not the "new employee" to which I am referring). Duh! I'm not sure she knows my full name (and I don't mean the middle name). I escaped as quickly as I could, giggling to myself down the hall. I was bummed when I got back to my classroom only to find that Luscious was gone!!! She had gone home to ride her bike so she can lose 100 more pounds this week.