Roast?

Roast: informal...to ridicule or criticize harshly...a facetious tribute, as at a banquet, in which the honoree is alternately praised and insulted~the freedictionary.com

Which definition is the most accurate? You be the judge!

Thank you for allowing me the distinct pleasure of being a part of this prestigious event. What a fabulous opportunity to reunite our honoree with a secret guest from his past (reveal box). Eight years ago I agreed to reveal to our guest of honor how I came to acquire this fine piece of craftsmanship. Until now, I had not kept up my part of the bargain. After hearing about this, I immediately knew that there was no better way to honor both the guest of honor and my secret. After wondering where the contents of this box were for 2 years, thinking it was somehow MY fault that they had not materialized, MY family (also known as Hubby's family), knowing my heartache over not knowing where the contents of this box was, made it their personal goal to put an end to my suffering. The contents of this box were sitting on a shelf at the funeral home. With the help of some amazing people, the balance of the bill was handled and I was finally at peace having possession of her remains, knowing that she was finally being honored in a respectful way. (Look at honoree) Did you ever wonder where she was or why the bills stopped coming? (Look at new one) My advice to you? Make sure your affairs are in order so this fate doesn't fall upon you...unless an eternity of sitting in a plastic bag on a shelf sounds enticing to you. LAUGHTER Now that I have your attention, I'd also like to take a moment to introduce you to your grandchildren...these are the children who live here year-round...they, like the grandchildren that visit a few times per year, like to go to the beach and go fishing. And now that you have a few moments to relax, and I have taken a considerable shorter amount of time than alotted, I hope you enjoy listening to one of the selections your granddaughter played in the all-district band...I know finding 8 minutes in your busy life to merely listen to the performance is extremely difficult. Don't worry...I wouldn't dream of making you listen to the other 3 selections. LEAVE THE BUILDING