I Wanna Rock

I wanna rock! ~ Twisted Sister

First of all, I must acknowledge my 1st Blog-iversary! I have been a blogger for one year! Yay!

Christmas was delightful! I am blessed with children who sleep in and don't rise at the crack of dawn to descend upon the treasures of Santa. We began opening gifts around 9am. The kids moved right through their presents at a good pace: not too fast nor too slow. :0) Daughter and I spent the rest of the day clad in our pj's. Gotta love a day like that!! Son was dressed and out the door as quickly as possible to try out the new bike and skateboard between rain showers. He also played with the neighbor (who showed up knocking excited about his new motorized scooter BEFORE my kids were up).

The majority of the afternoon was spent rocking out with the Play Station 2 game Guitar Hero. I am not a video gamer by nature BUT I am completely addicted to this game. The neighbor kid commented, "I didn't know a teacher could rock!" I guess he hasn't seen School of Rock...hee hee. Daughter, Girlfriend, and I took turns rockin' out this game. For those unfamiliar, it is a game that comes with a guitar and the color coded "notes" appear on the screen. The songs are true rock....I Love Rock and Roll, I Wanna Be Sedated, Iron Man, More Than a Feeling, etc. and get increasingly hard. We "beat" the game on easy and are now struggling through the songs again on medium. My eyes are glassy...my arms and fingers are cramped to the point that I am having trouble typing (thank God for the backspace button). Hubby has yet to get the guitar in his hands and looks longingly at it as I grasp it tightly attempting to play Smoke on the Water. Daughter is presently screaming at it because the difficulty levels are increasing. I have a bit of an advantage since more of the songs are familiar to me and have some clue about what they are supposed to sound like. There's even a Guitar Hero II available!!! So, if you don't hear from me for a few days....it's a safe bet to assume that I'm rockin'!

UPDATE: Guitar Hero is still being played for hours at a time. What will I do next week when I can't rock each day away? Hubby and I went out to a friend's last night and when we got home I rocked out with the girls until midnight!!! BTW: Guitar Hero 2 has been ordered. I am presently downloading some of the songs from LimeWire (yes, I looked up the play list that is on GH2) so I can become familiar with the songs that are going to kick my butt.....I need to hone my skills. ROCK ON!!!

Festivus

Another Festivus miracle! ~ Kramer

It's December 23rd and that means only one thing.....Festivus! Celebrate with your loved ones and enjoy!

All is Well

Nobody's walking out on this fun, old-fashioned family Christmas. No, no. We're all in this together. This is a full-blown, four-alarm holiday emergency here. We're gonna press on, and we're gonna have the hap, hap, happiest Christmas since Bing Crosby tap-danced with Danny fucking Kaye. And when Santa squeezes his fat white ass down that chimney tonight, he's gonna find the jolliest bunch of assholes this side of the nuthouse. ~ Clark Griswold

Are you familiar with Christmas Vacation? Things around here were getting far too intense this week...similar to Clark's dysfunctional holiday celebration. If it could go wrong, it did. If it was something to induce stress, it did. We have cussed that Polar Express float like mad. The paint fiasco, racing against the deadline, trying to make everything "just right". How to get a light to shine from the front. What music would work and how would we broadcast it? How long would it take to tie shiny ribbon to the 375 tiny bells we planned to throw in complete Polar Express fashion?

Ultimately, we ended up getting all the bells tied. Burned downloaded Polar Express music on a CD was blasted through Daughter's infamous karaoke machine (sans the microphone). The girls, clad in their pj's threw candy and bells (we kept a few for the judges....hey, no harm in shamelessly trying to woo the judges). Hubby and Clem drove the truck with Son, Lil Clem, Three (the neighbor's son), and the Girl Scout Lady's son in the back. One of my male students oddly ended up in our truck, too. Weird. Clementine and I walked in front of the truck carrying a banner....Hubby really missed his chance for revenge. We had a super time! All the stress of the week vanished. Seeing the girls laughing and smiling was awesomely satisfying...the way it was meant to be. To top it all off.....WE WON! We won $250 (wait for the irony....) in the Most Community Spirit category. Good thing they didn't hear us muttering the "f-bomb" profusely in reference to the train throughout the week. Now that it's over maybe the Christmas spirit will finally enter our home. Daughter DID throw out the gords this morning. That's definitely a start.

Note to Self

Just say NO. ~ Nancy Reagan

[Weather] can be a shattering force of ruin and desolation. But it can also be a patch of soft spring sky, a pattering of rain on thirsty leaves, a witchery of fog across the hills, a silence of snow over the city.
~ Phillip Thompson

Without the burden of time grad school imposed upon my life I felt compelled to get involved in other ventures after graduating. Using my new-found time in a stress-free manner was not good enough for me. I especially felt the need to be more involved with my children since they were practically abandoned by me during that two year debacle. Having fond memories of Girl Scouting, I decided to be a co-leader with Clementine. Space was available for me to do this because her co-leader was moving away. Excited about this new adventure, I had all sorts of ideas for things to do: camping, trips, earning badges, AND the mother of them all: taking part in the local Christmas parade. I love the BOOK The Polar Express by Chris Van Allsburg and thought, "Hey, a train...kids in pj's....bells of Christmas." Did I think hemorrhoid? NO. Should I have? YES. Hubby has taken the brunt of this harebrained idea and Brother and Brother's Wife even took off half a day of work to assemble and paint the *&"?! train. Fortunately Clem was able to locate a train that way already made...just had to be assembled and painted. I used one of my "get out of jail free" cards to leave school half an hour early. I had to pick up more paint since the paint that was mixed at Ace was NOT the black we had requested. The gallon was $27! So, in addition to the extra workload that my simple idea has created, the financial aspect has also been a burden. I was referred to a man who wanted to make a charitable donation to scouts during the holidays. I had mentioned the float to this person and she urged me to contact him. I hate to call and beg for money. Loathe is an even better word to describe my feelings about soliciting funds for anything. I should have ditched the idea since the man made me feel like I was some sort of monster...asking for money when there were needy people this time of year. He cited other groups he continuously donated to (both of which I am well familiar with and have contributed to in the past myself) as an example of his generosity and my selfishness. I would not have made such a call had it not been for the urging of this person. So, after I hung up, ashamed, I sat in my car in front of the hardware store and cried while my daughter asked for some help with her homework (then I went into the hardware store to pick up the paint wearing my sunglasses and looking like some drug-using freak). Add this to the other responsibilities associated with this time of year: Daughter's ball practice, church events, work responsibilities, gift shopping, Daughter's birthday party, Girl Scout meetings...blah, blah, blah...and it all equals a freakishly stressed household. I keep reading Hippie's Chick's blog and seeing all of her lovely Christmas decorations (example 1 and example 2)and then look at my house that still has freakin' gords and hay under the front tree, a Christmas tree in the back of the truck, not a single trace of Christmas ANYWHERE in my home (unless you count the 2 gifts I have wrapped and stacked among clutter in my bedroom). It looks like the atheists live here - which is probably what the man on the phone would think of me anyway! Want to hear the absolute BEST part? The fog has been thick and quite prevalent lately. Paint and fog don't mix. Hubby went to our friend's driveway (where the monstrosity is being assembled) last night to check on his baby. The dampness has totally screwed up the painting we did yesterday. It was all for nothing. The fog continues to roll in. So, for today, FOG IS A SHATTERING FORCE OF RUIN AND DESOLATION. I am not one of those New Years Resolution kind of people. However, I think I may give it a try this year. Why not? It may just be the only thing I can say NO to. My theme for 2007 will be SIMPLIFY. I will keep the commitments I have since I have already agreed to them....I can't just (shudder to say it) quit. However, I resolve to say NO any new time-stealer. I resolve to keep everything I have committed to SIMPLE. No more elaborate schemes. I see others who consistently live their lives in "half-ass" mode. They receive the same spoils in life without the stress, panic, anxiety, and overall nausea that comes with being a neurotic freak. I resolve to become a half-asser.

Party Like a Rock Star

Show me what you got lil mama
Show me what you got pretty lady
Show me what you got shawty
Show me what you got baby ~ Jay-Z

On Friday night I entertained 14 girls ranging in ages from 10 to 12(?) for what is mistakenly referred to as a 'slumber party'. Daughter turned 11 on Dec. 6 and this form of revelry has become tradition. We use a friend's rental cottage....not one of the monsters. It's a quaint two bedroom place in a quiet neighborhood on a miniscule island. Sometimes in the winter Hubby and I take the kids over there for a change of scenery. It is directly on the water and typically peaceful and serene....until the 'slumber party'. This year our theme was Rock Star. We have had the Make-Over party (where the girls played with make-up, did hair nails, etc.) and the Spa Party (facials, smoothies, massages, hair conditioning, etc.) and both were a lot of fun. Girls and make-up and hair crap....guaranteed success. This year we had spray-in hair dye, make-up, hair crimping and/or staightening and/or curling, and a drink station (each drink recipe was posted in the kitchen with a trendy Tween rock star name - the traditional Shirley Temple was named The Baby V after Vanessa Hudgens; there was a Hannah Montana - blue punch and Sprite; and the Sweetah Cheetah named after the Cheetah Girls - ginger ale and vanilla). The girls love to mix up their own stuff. Upon arrival, each girl was given their gift bag with a plain plastic cup to decorate with those "bling bling" rhinestones created for cell phones. There was karaoke (thanks to a cool b-day gift), too. The dance contest that the girls organized was a sight to behold. I may have witnessed a career-in-the-making out of some of these chicks. "Oh, yes. I remember how she shook what her mama gave her (instructions given by the emcee of the dance contest) at Daughter's 11th birthday party. I saw such talent in her then. The only thing missing were the dollar bills stuffed in her panties....and the pasties."
Did I mention the drama? What tween party would be complete without it? There were more than 5 incidents involving tears over "hogging of the microphone", "too loud to sleep", "no one paying attention to singing", "snotty pants", "acting like a brat", yadda, yadda, yadda. Did I mention that I did this act of love AFTER a long week of teaching? Let's just say that by the time I encouraged "lights out" and "snuggle" up around midnight, my patience was much thinner than at 6 pm. However, not as thin as it became as the night extended into the wee hours of the morning. Between midnight and three I dealt with many issues. One of which was Truth or Dare. When I first got the tweens settled in, I completely closed the bedroom door to give the girls some privacy. After becoming aware of the attrocities being committed during Truth or Dare, I would no longer shut the door and by 2:30 the door was completely open and would remain that way for the remainder of the shin-dig. I felt I was in some demented version of Girls Gone Wild. Girls kissed (on the cheek only - or so I have been told). By the time I realized what was going on and intervened, three girls had exposed their breasts (and believe me there were sights to see) and one had completely pulled her pants down. Had I expected THIS?! NO!!!! This was quite a change from our previous parties. I did the best I could to thwart the activity without making them feel ashamed. I just told them that I didn't think nudity was appropriate and that asking others to show private areas could make people feel bad. I also asked them to think about how they would feel at school when people started talking or if they happened to see me in the hall at school. I explained that I would really feel odd having to explain this to their parents. By 3:15 when there had been verbal ugliness imposed upon the majority of the girls by a group of three girls I finally lost every last bit of patience I had. I told one girl that we could call her family if the noise level was that big of a deal (that was at one of the quietest moments of the night) and then I spoke really firmly to another one of the guests stating bluntly that I did not want to hear another peep out of her. Girlfriend spent the night, too. She is not a night owl and ended up falling asleep before midnight in the room where I was sleeping. I woke her up at least three times throughout the night. She'd sleepily ask, "Are they still up?"
"Yup."
"What are they doing?"
I'd explain the newest tragedy. With each event, she was more and more bewildered....as was I. We planned a Rock Star party. I guess we got it. Everyone was gone by 10:30 leaving me to clean up. In addition to the expected unclaimed clothing...socks, shorts, a pillow....I was delighted to find a Care Free pad under the love seat....unused thank goodness....peeled from the plastic preserving the "sticky" part. Nudity. Feminine hygiene products. Girl on girl kissing. A mother's delight. Daughter, Girlfriend, and I did have fun imitating the more dramatic events of the night (no, we did NOT expose any private parts). Overall it was fun and festive. I've heard that the girls had fun. I suppose that's what counts. Next year, however, I am going to push for an Amish theme.

Tagged

Getting to know you,
Getting to know all about you.
Getting to like you,
Getting to hope you like me. ~ Oscar Hammerstein

My friend Hippie’s Chick tagged me on her blog challenging me to respond to this. Remind me to stop commenting on blogs! JUST KIDDING! I can never resist these things even when I have responded to the same questions zillions of times. Her answers reflect her eclectic lifestyle and her affinity for fine things. My answers remind me of Roseanne Barr or Peg Bundy. :0)

1. Egg Nog or Hot Chocolate?

I am enticed by the spicy smell of egg nog…even the prospect of a little alcohol…however, I really do not care for the taste. It’s kind of like sushi to me (prepare for what some may consider to be a statement of pure blasphemy). I can do it, but it’s nothing I crave, need to have, or would consider my life cheated by never experiencing it again. Having said that, I guess I really do not need to detail my preference. I am a modern girl and do anything I can to cut corners in order to make more time for some other “need to do” so I generally either order elsewhere or resort to Swiss Miss. Want to hear a sad one? I went to The Dancing Turtle, a local coffee shop (which has been here for a few yrs and I only crossed the threshold THIS past week for the first time – it WON’T be my last as I have already been there twice and am addicted), for a peppermint mocha and offered a hot chocolate to Daughter. She found it to be “bitter” and “nasty”….it was quite different from the Swiss Miss she usually gets and therefore disgusting in her eyes.

2. Does Santa wrap presents or put them under the tree?

In order to preserve Santa’s precious time, we have informed him that we do not mind if he leaves them unwrapped at our house. Our children are aware of the fact that parents contact Santa to let him know our preference.

3. Colored lights on the tree/house or white?

White exclusively. Hubby and I both grew up with colored lights, but for some reason are in mutual agreement of using white only. Why? I really don’t know. Surprisingly, I don’t even think I need to spend time pondering this preference which is odd for me as I tend to overanalyze everything. Yes, I am shocking myself.

4. Do you hang mistletoe?

I hung it in the house one year when I received it from a student. Otherwise, I don’t. It’s not that I don’t appreciate kisses….it’s just that I worry about what that boogie dog might do to it. I do have a fake display that was standard in my house as I was growing up. It, like many things that once lived at home, is now in my classroom. At present it is hanging from the audio enhancement system above the chair in my desk….not MY doing. So far it hasn’t yielded any kisses which is super for me. Nothing like avoiding molestation charges. I did have a close call when the principal came to my desk…..thankfully he didn’t see it and I scooted my chair out before he had a chance to spot it. Note to self: move the mistletoe.

5. When do you put your decorations up?

After Daughter’s birthday party weekend….I like to keep it separate. I think I am the only person in the free world that does not have a single decoration out….unless you count the white lights still dangling in the tree from last year….does that qualify me for the brunt of a Jeff Foxworthy joke? No, they have not been lit since last year.

6. What is your favorite holiday dish?

I have a pretty one with holly leaves on it from Pfaltzgraff. Hee Hee! Just kidding! I really don’t have a “real” dish that I have to have around Christmas. I love the simple snacks (cheese & crackers and beefsticks, cookies, fudge, etc.) that we put out after church on Christmas Eve. Hubby and I (and the kids, etc.) live in the family home. His dad grew up here as did all of Hubby’s siblings. The house has always been a gathering place for the entire family. Each Christmas Eve we all go to church and gather here for snacks after the service. It’s something I look forward to every year. The snacks are not elaborate, but are guaranteed to taste delicious. It’s also when Girlfriend, Daughter, and I debut our holiday creations. For several years we have gotten together to bake cookies or make bark or something yummy. Another tradition we love. :0)

7. Favorite holiday memory as a child?

I used to lie on the floor at the base of the tree with the all the lights off….except for the blinking, colored lights on the tree…and watch the patterns created by the lights and fake tree needles on the ceiling. I also remember the excitement of decorating the tree each year. Our tree had a nursery rhyme theme and it was like visiting old friends each year when it was decorating time.

8. When and how did you learn the truth about Santa?

I have always believed in the magic of Santa. Generosity and love are characteristics that make the holiday what it is.

9. Do you open a gift on Christmas Eve?

I typically don’t. The children do, though. It’s not much of a surprise anymore, but it’s always a new pair of pajamas and a book. The new pajamas make for pretty pictures and the book helps settle us in at bedtime.

10. How do you decorate the Christmas tree?

By hand. Duh. OK, enough of the smart-ass answer. Our tree is adorned with white lights. Hubby likes a red and white tree (I guess after his favorite store – sorry, local joke…sorry for more “smart-ass”) and I have really grown fond of this scheme even though a few that don’t follow the “rules” make it in – the Babies First Christmas ones, those handmade by my inlaws, etc. We hang shiny red glass balls (yup, the cheap ones from either K-Mart or Walmart). We also hang a strand of gold beads. The majority of the other ornaments are the crocheted (?) snowflakes and angels made out of white cloth. The tree is rather “old-fashioned” looking….completely different from my childhood tree.

11. Snow. Love it or dread it?

I am not a big fan of the snow. My body temperature is similar to the outdoor temps in Antarctica….I am constantly cold. I don’t want to be out in the cold. I don’t want to miss school because we just have to make it up on a Saturday or on another day that we are scheduled to have off. I grew up with snow and DID enjoy it then. Hot chocolate, mounds of snow to dig in, sledding. My cynical adult life has altered my view of snow. I dread the snow….I feel obligated to get in it with the kids when it DOES snow, but I could do without it.

12. Can you ice skate?

I have been skating before. The talent agents ruined it for me…..surrounding me, hounding me to represent our country in competition – kinda ruined the joy of it. Fearing I’d dash the dreams of young talent, I have retired from the sport. No need to rub my expertise in the face of others. BAH! HAH! What a joke! Let’s see….intentionally go to a building where I KNOW it’s going to be cold…sure. The last time I went I was in college. I could probably be coerced into going again, but do not feel deprived by staying happily at home.

13. Favorite holiday movie?

I don’t have one. I detest A Christmas Story with that kid in the glasses. I’ve seen it, even quote the words, but I really find it annoying….esp. when it’s played for 24 hours straight….what ass thought of that?! Christmas Vacation is quite entertaining and so is Surviving Christmas with Ben Affleck. I am drawn to holiday movies with a dysfunctional family. Yes, I am warped.

I enjoy the old Christmas specials like Rudolph and the one with the Burgermeister. My FAVORITE one of those is Twas the Night Before Christmas….the animated one with the mice and the big clock.

14. What is your favorite holiday dessert?

Anything chocolate…..

15. What is a favorite holiday tradition?

Christmas Eve church service @ our church followed by the get together @ my house. It wouldn’t be Christmas any other way. :0)

Preparing treats with Daughter, Son, & Girlfriend.

Delivering plates of cookies w/the sisters-in-law

16. What tops your tree?

The stuff UNDER the tree…..far better than what's on top - hee hee

An angel.

17. Which do you prefer: giving or receiving?

Giving….even though I suck at selecting good gifts. I hate to receive. It further demonstrates just how bad of a gift selector I am. The thoughtfulness of each gift I receive touches my heart and makes me sad because I do not have a knack for eliciting such a response in others. I enjoy watching others light up as they open gifts. I'd be just as satisfied on ANY holiday without a gift. The few times I HAVE succeeded in achieving “giving success” have made me feel SO good. Seeing Hubby get that puppy last year still warms my heart.

18. What is your favorite Christmas song?

O Holy Night….when sung by someone with true talent I get chills and my eyes fill up every time!!!

19. Candy canes?

Bah humbug….like sushi and egg nog – could do without, but when in sugar crisis they work.

I am supposed to tag others….if you read this, you had BETTER consider yourself tagged….if you don’t, expect coal in your stocking!

Karaoke

Only the good die young. ~ Billy Joel

Daughter doesn't know it but as I write I am listening to her sing Only the Good Die Young using the karaoke machine she received for her birthday. I am surprised to know how well she knows the words....chalk it up to a good upbringing. :0)

Weather

If you don't like the weather, wait a minute. ~ unknown

It's hard to believe that I was able to take a picture of a sky like this on Wednesday evening. The weather had been wicked Tuesday and Wednesday (and then reared its ugly head again Thursday) but we were smiled upon and reassured that everything would be beautiful again soon.

Gangsta

All I really know is she's a gangsta. ~ Thicke

Girlfriend came over on Friday so Hubby and I could escape for a bit. When we got home the kids wanted to cook so we made peanut butter bars. We blasted the XM the whole time and put powdered sugar in inappropriate places to pose for pictures. Lovely photo, huh? The Cult will be so pleased when I weigh in December as I'm sure I will have to pay for eating so much during Thanksgiving break. There's only so much one can do when stuck in the house for days on end. After we made these delights, Girlfriend stayed for dinner....ultimately spending the night. As I have said previously, it's always delightful chaos when she comes over. This time, I found the most ridiculous pj's I own (blue flannel with white duckies on them - they're older than the hills and are so stretched out it's embarassing that I still own them....but I knew Girlfriend would have fun with them) to lend to Girlfriend for the night. However, I didn't know exactly what it would lead to.....Gangsta Girlfriend. I don't know what I like best....the grillz, the razr phone, or the Wild Turkey. The rest of the night was pretty uneventful....the kids watched The Shaggy Dog while Hubby and I watched (err...I slept through most of) The DaVinci Code. The next morning was another feast....chocolate & peanut butter chip pancakes a la Hubby. YUMMY! Then it was back to wallowing....Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. Yes, I fell asleep during this one, too. At least I'd seen this one a zillion times. I really couldn't help it....I'd been up since 6:30 am for no particular reason. All in all...another fun time with the kids. :0)

Over?!

Back to life, back to reality ~ Soul II Soul

Yes, I'm whining. I do not want to go back to work tomorrow!! Despite the despicable
weather at the beginning of the break, the weather the last two days has been absolutely gorgeous! Today we took Finley to the beach to romp in the surf while chasing her orange, rubber dummy. The sky was a magnificent shade of blue. The temperature was warm enough for Son & Hubby to wear shorts and for Daughter to roll her pants up. As for me, it was pretty amazing (due to my frigid internal temperature) that I was only in sweats, two shirts, and a sweatshirt. The kids ran up and down the beach looking for shells (scarce) and examining the dunes that resembled rock formations showing layers of rock from ages ago.....merely an effect caused by the high surf Tues.-Fri. last week. We only saw three other people on this stretch of beach and were able to let Finley run free (since the Park Service wasn't in sight)....confirming that we do live in what we perceive to be paradise. Sure, the weather is unpredictable and our lifeline (the road) to the "real world" could be severed at any point, BUT days like today reaffirm our decision to live here. Our friends and family are here and I am quite fond of my hermit-like lifestyle. Sometimes I DO think about living in an area where I could just hop over to Target or cool, trendy stores and restaurants....but what I would be giving up is just too precious. Plus, I think it would desensitize me....the shopping trips that I love would just lose their meaning. Tomorrow I'll be back to the grind. Boo. I didn't even come close to accomplishing all that I wanted to do around the house during the break - as if it was a possibility...my lists are always so unreasonable. I really didn't even completely de-stress (I never even got to watch one minute of The View) - as if I EVER completely de-stress anymore. Christmas Break.....can't wait!!!

Bah Humbug!

Bah humbug! ~ Ebeneezer Scrooge

The color of the sky as far as I can see is coal grey.
Lift my head from the pillow and then fall again.
With a shiver in my bones just thinking about the weather.
A quiver in my lips as if I might cry. ~ Natalie Merchant

OK. So Scrooge isn't typically associated with Thanksgiving....but it sadly encompasses the mood I've been in today. Perhaps it's the weather. The food was delicious. The company was wonderful. The power went off mid-meal, but the community building where we all gather has a generator so we were just fine....and thankful that all our dishes were complete and ready for the taking. Again, screw that Kelly Chandler. She'd probably have eaten outdoors in the cold like the Pilgrims themselves. "Not I," said the pig (quote from The Little Red Hen). Still, I've been in a dismal mood most of the day. It sucks to be in a funk on a holiday. I've tried to shake it, but it insists on staying. It didn't help that I awoke with a migraine and the caffeine in the medicine makes me shaky. Oh, well.

Son's Mom Challenge for today? The yard is really wet from all the rain. Finley has pooped a bit too close to the back entry steps as a result. The weather has prevented me from poop scooping...ok, I probably could have done it, but I did NOT want to be out in the ugliness. My last words as Son and Daughter headed for the truck: "Please watch your step. Don't step in dog poop." That was it. My fate was sealed. Moments later my son comes back up the steps elated that he has stepped in dog poop. Me? Not so happy. Hubby set down the asparagus casserole and commenced to washing the shoe that we had to force him to wear anyway. HE wanted to wear flip flops. Yeesh! I took the mashed potatoes to the truck and then came back in to help Son change his pants since he had tried to remove the poo by rubbing the filthy right foot on the inside left leg of his pants. Did he want to change? NOOOO! The battle ensued. I finally won when I said, "Fine. You can be the one at Thanksgiving that smells like poo.".....definitely reminiscent of Adam Sandler in Big Daddy when he says something to the effect of "I have the smelly kid in the class?"....not to mention the extra incentive I used to change his mind. That's the basic jist of it. Maybe I should write a book....Fun With Son: Tales of Desperation.

We've Got the Juice

I said I wanted to go back to a time when there (weren't) cars or computers or electricity because you had to work for what you wanted. Everything wasn't handed to you. ~ Kelly Chandler

I do not know Kelly Chandler and after reading her quote I know I totally disagree with her. I have worked hard in order to buy a car, computer, and a generator so I do not have to sit in a dark, cold house when the power is off for over 12 hours in a day due to inclement weather. Living in what many perceive to be "paradise" has its negative side, too. The Nor'easter has left us unable to get off our island and without electricity since 5 something this morning. Poo on Kelly Chandler. Yay for the generator so I can use my computer during a major power-outage!

Additional comment (11-23-06): This is a photo taken yesterday of Highway 12 heading south toward Rodanthe. This is our lifeline as we only have one road connecting us with the rest of the world. See what I mean about the negative side to paradise? At the present moment, bulldozers are trying as hard as they can to get the road open. Check out the live cam to see the progress.

Sentimental Song of the Moment

There are two lasting bequests we can give our children: One is roots, the other is wings. ~ Hodding Carter

Regular readers know that on occasion I blog about song lyrics. Sometimes I rant about their foulness...other times I rave about those that I find meaningful. Well, here's the new one on my RAVE list. Again, it's probably been around for a bit, but the lyrics have finally penetrated through the other noise constantly buzzing in my head (Today I need to.... Did I ..... Remember to ..... - you know) and I get teary every time I hear them. I just finished downloading My Wish by Rascal Flatts from LimeWire so I can get teary any time I want!!! It's amazing how all the basic wishes I have for my children can be compactly set to music in under 5 minutes.

I hope that the days come easy and the moments pass slow,
And each road leads you where you want to go,
And if you're faced with a choice, and you have to choose,
I hope you choose the one that means the most to you.
And if one door opens to another door closed,
I hope you keep on walkin' till you find the window,
If it's cold outside, show the world the warmth of your smile,

But more than anything, more than anything,
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.

I hope you never look back, but ya never forget,
All the ones who love you, in the place you left,
I hope you always forgive, and you never regret,
And you help somebody every chance you get,
Oh, you find God's grace, in every mistake,
And you always give more than you take.

But more than anything, yeah, and more than anything,
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.

This is my wish
I hope you know somebody loves you
May all your dreams stay big ~ RASCAL FLATTS

'Tis the Season?

Did you ever notice that life seems to follow certain patterns? Like I noticed that every year around this time, I hear Christmas music. ~ Tom Sims

I recently read an entry on Hippie Chick's blog in which she voiced her feelings about Christmas "starting" already when Thanksgiving hasn't even come. Like her, I typically enjoy not seeing Christmas up-close-and-personal until AFTER Thanksgiving. Some radio/XM stations have already started playing Christmas music....not just a few songs here and there....all Christmas all the time. Not something I am truly ready for! However, I have to admit, in a desperate move to get the kids MOVING the other morning, I found one of these stations and blasted it throughout the house. I thought it might be so odd that it would make them cheerful and quick - bah, hah. I must also admit that as much as I DON'T want to hear Christmas music yet, I got to hear my ABSOLUTE FAVORITE Christmas song and it filled me with absolute joy. To me, there is nothing more beautiful than a well-sung version of O Holy Night. It made me just a little excited for the Christmas season to begin. For now, though, I am looking forward to stuffing myself with all the delicacies of Thanksgiving!!!

Snips and Snails

The force is strong with this one. ~ Darth Vader

As I enjoyed a few non-stress moments visiting in the living room with Brother the other night watching two mindless shows on tv (Dancing With the Stars and Dukes of Hazard), I suddenly noticed an odd look on his face. He was gazing at the picture hanging on the wall above the couch (where I was sitting). It didn't take him long to comment on the substance oozing forth from the bottom corner of the frame. On closer inspection, we noticed that both corners of the frame were glued to the wall. Daughter didn't do it. Hubby didn't do it. Son absolutely claimed no knowledge of it (and I certainly believe him -wink wink). I guess that leaves Finley or that Boogie Dog. Perhaps I have finally lost it and did it myself and just don't remember. If that's the case, I'm sure I was just trying to preserve something in the house before my miniature homewrecker gets a hold of it. How long before I finally surrender to the Dark Side?

Fin-Doggy-Dog

If you don't own a dog, at least one, there is not necessarily anything wrong with you, but there may be something wrong with your life. ~ Roger Caras

Last Saturday was Finley's first birthday. It's hard to believe she has been a part of our family for almost a year. She is a great girl! She still get's on her Wild Rampages (as we refer to her run-around-the-house-chasing-down-the-children-and-creating-complete-and-total-chaos), but she makes us all smile. She LOVES to be scratched on her chest and makes sure to get her nightly "lovin's" before falling to sleep. We are all completely in love with our baby. She has numerous nicknames: Fin Dog, Finni-Fin-Fin, Finni-Baby AND Fin-Doggy-Dog. I'm sure there are others. As with our other children, we reserve her full name, (Finley Makaira) for when she is in BIG TROUBLE....like when she destroyed the bathroom, chewed up Barbie, amputated Batman's foot, chewed a vast number of flip flops, gnawed her way through the vacuum and carpet shampooer cords...and the cord for the candle warmer, chewed the handle on the recliner, yadda, yadda, yadda. Hey....it's no worse than the destruction created by Son. BUT that's a blog entry unto itself. Smiles for my dog! :0)

Heh Heh

Bottles and booties, diapers and pins
this is where the love begins! ~ unknown

Monday, November 13...could I possibly have more crap to do today? I went to work...to school...to do a major second grade project which created even more than the regular amount of chaos. Then, since I have to check in this week with the CULT, I had to go to step class. I enjoy the class but hate having to get there dressed and on time. Then, I had the Girl Scout leader meeting. Then it was off to PTA b/c my class was performing. And then to a baby shower. I was SO GLAD NOT TO BE PREGNANT! THey actually served a variety of martinis. And since I am not pregnant....I could indulge!!! Maybe a little too much since I find my fingers having to hit "backspace" far too often. i also find myself rambling. The food was not as impressive as I had hoped, but I DID get to spend time with my friend Joy. I LOVE spending time with Joy....she is fun, witty, and shares similar anal tendencies with me. She is expecting a new bundle herself in Feb. SHe is having her second daughter. She was ever so hopeful that she was having a boy. I LOVE my son dearly, but I warned her to stop after the girl. In the span of the past few weeks the urination issues we have experience are so male that I am beginning to lose my patience. You more than likely read the peeing on the floor blog. I don't believe I shared the pooping at the marina OUTDOORS story in writing. Today has brought us to the "peeing in the Spiderman trash can" episode. WHat is it with his fascination with peeing in his room?! At least it wasn't on the carpet this time! YUCK! I thought it was horrible when I caught him peeing off the porch when the school bus came by...I WISH he was peeing outside rather than in his room! Well, I'm going to put my half-drunken self to bed since it is after 11 and WAY past my bedtime...usually well before 10. I leave thankful that I am not bearing another child and wondering why Son feels the need to pee in his room.

Oh, Well....

There is always time for failure. ~ John Mortimer

Did I set myself up for failure or what? A blog a day....how long did it take me to stop? I have really excellent excuses. Shall I enumerate them?

1. Cheerleading on Saturday. Over an hour drive to get there....only to find out (after busting butt to get there on time) that the time had been changed from 1 to 3. At least that gave me time to take Daughter and Girlfriend to Wendy's. We had only missed one "cheer event" all season and that was THE ONE where the newly revised schedule had been handed out. One of the sassy teenage coaches swore up and down that ALL the girls had been given the new schedule. With an air of sarcasm in my voice I asked, "At the last practice?"
"No, the one before that."
"Oh, so the ONLY time we missed."
A bit more humbly: "Sorry."
We did a bit of shopping. Loads of fun being silly with Daughter and Girlfriend. We even caught some not-so-nice looks from other people in the public bathroom at the outlet mall. We weren't THAT bad. I thought we were getting arrested after pulling out of 7-11. Good grief...my sister-in-law is going to have second thoughts about letting Girlfriend go anywhere with me again unless I explain! We had been in 7-11 getting some drinks/snacks for the drive home. It was now dark. As we pulled out of the parking lot, Daughter began to wonder if we had been charged for the Laffy Taffy. Maybe I was wrong, but I did not turn around to go back in to ask (since reason #2 for Blog Failure was keeping our schedule a bit tight). Daughter has this new light thingy that she can wear on her ear so she can read in the car. She loves to read in the car....not a trait from me - I puke. The light is kind of blue...she had it on her ear and was bobbing about as 10-year-olds do...yes, it made me think we were getting stopped by the cops for stealing Laffy Taffy. Just the light.

2. God's Bounty Sat. evening. On the way home we saw many possibilities for food we could take to our church fundraiser. My brother and his wife headed up this event that served wild game and seafood entrees for a donation. As we encountered deer and road kill on the way home, Daughter, Girlfriend, and I devised ways we could get the food possibilities to the event. We yelled "God's Bounty" at each sighting. We thought about dragging the deer behind the car using rope (Family Vacation style) or getting a large hook to stick out the window. Yes, we are an odd bunch....but boy do we have fun. We worked at the event and cleaned up. I got home 9-ish. Chatted with Brother & His Wife and Hubby. Went to bed...too exhausted to blog - but hey, I did good deeds on Saturday.

3. Ear issues. My ear that was infected in the spring still likes to remind me that it is part of my body. Rather than being ignored, it wants to throb or gurgle or cause a headache. On Saturday, it wanted to ruin me with a headache (no it was NOT the hip hop music played far too loud). It gurgled. It just annoyed me. On Sunday it made me a bit dizzy....nothing some motion sickness medication couldn't handle. I took some decongestants and some other stuff. I napped a bit on Sunday and (unfortunately) was better by Monday-which did not warrant a day off.

4. Report Cards. I despise report cards. This year we have to do them on the computer. I stayed at school until 7-ish on Mon. to get them done. There was a glitch with the spacing. Blah. Blah. Blah. Needless to say, I will have to redo them for the next 9 weeks because the glitch will ultimately cause them to be sesveral pages long. Did I mention I hate report cards?

5. State Report. Fifth grade report/project on New Jersey. Daughter and I have been steadily working...leaving nowhere to blog.

6. School. Each new month at school means taking down all the "stuff" from the previous month and putting out the new "stuff". It's very similar to putting up Christmas decorations and taking them down except it is EVERY FREAKIN' MONTH!! This year the process is a bit different since I am working with someone else. Hmmm. Is that positive? Let me move on because I am presently unhappy with that person. I have never given her a name on my blog and have several inappropriate ones I could use. Why am I unhappy? Presently I am unhappy because she felt the need to give her opinion of my child rearing skills (concerning academics) to one of Daughter's teachers which basically made me sound like some kind of freak. She obviously does not approve of the high expectations Hubby and I have for Daughter. She is entitled to her opinion. However, she does not spend more than 30 minutes per day with Daughter and me. So, let's wrap this section up by saying that this week has consisted of me staying late to get stuff done and being angry at my co-worker. Work is great.

So, I may not have reached my blogging goal, but I have been very busy. I didn't even touch on worrying about beginning Girl Scouts as a co-leader this week! I have focused on how I can abuse my children by my obsessive work habits and my freakishly high academic expectations. What evil shall I devise next? Anyway, gotta run....can't miss snuggling in bed with my kids to watch the newest episode of Lost....what hell they must endure. Is that Social Services I hear knocking on my door?

More Halloween

AWWWW....sexy girlfriend! ~ Long Duc Dong

Here is Girlfriend on Halloween. She has been hangin' out again and we love it. Last night we did my pathetic version of "the Hustle" to Donna Summer on the XM. Tonight she came to Fall Festival at the elementary school and is here again. She's been showing me some stuff on myspace.com. I apologize for the short, babbling blog....but it's late and I'm outta here.

Mystery Guest

She looks like a skeleton....I was horrified at how skinny she is. ~ Nicole Richie

For most of the month of October we have been fortunate to have this famous runway model visiting our humble abode. It was ridiculous the amount of money we had to pay her to do this considering she was unable to find work overseas since her body mass index was too low to be considered for employment. The major plus, however, was that she didn't need to be fed.

Smart-ass aside, Hubby was truly inspired to make a pair of these (another is in the rocking chair on my porch) after seeing one in Family Fun magazine. She is fashioned out of PVC pipe, can be disassembled for storing, won't rust in the salty air, and is incredibly sturdy (except for the flimsy hand that was not made out of PVC)....able to withstand the strong winds we have had this month - unlike the pathetic mums that have been through the wringer. I think I can count on one hand the number of mornings I haven't had to hunt down the pots and stand them upright (only to come home to find them toppled again).

Irritation

The best answer to anger is silence. ~ unknown

I have been trying to upload a picture that HAS to be posted with the entry I wrote. Blogger WILL NOT upload the picture. It is now time for Lost so this is it for tonight. Way to start off a month of blogging each day, huh! In my case, the best answer to anger is UNWRITTEN.

Meet Clem

High on a hill was a lonely goatherd
Lay ee odl lay ee odl lay hee hoo ~ Maria von Trapp

Clem is our friend. He happens to be (as stated on his official business card) the City Executive at the local branch of First South Bank. He made a deal that he would wear this lovely ensemble if the bank reached a goal. Sometimes successfully reaching a goal can suck, huh?

Halloween...in short!

A lot of adults are very into Halloween. ~ Suzanne Smith

Sorry for the pitiful entry...I can already tell you that I am not "on a roll" for writing or ranting, but want to try to write every day. I think I will be more inspired when I have the photos and am not ready to embrace slumber. I am definitely not into the "trick-or-treat" aspect of this holiday. Costumes and handing out candy are my main interests. What's truly sad is that Ethel, her husband....who I guess should be called Fred...., and I took our brood of kids out for the evening (if one considers an evening 'under two hours'). We made our way around our small neighborhood via their pick-up truck...lined with pillows nonetheless. Pure laziness....but then again, who wants to tromp around the neighborhood carrying our alcoholic beverages when we can drive with them? I have vivid memories of childhood trick-or-treating.....hours of walking....no trucks or transportation of any kind. We begged for that candy until our legs ached and we were practically frozen (yes, I grew up in THE NORTH). Fortunately, tonight was a nice evening (I think the ones in the back of the truck who had to endure the mosquitoes who were obviously out trick-or-treating for their favorite delicacy may disagree). The kids collected an abundance of candy. I ate myself sick all day (we had a Character Costume Party at school - I was Stellaluna - which my daughter insisted I wear this evening too). Oh...and best of all....Son introduced us to a new entity that lives in our house. In addition to "I Don't Know" and "I Didn't Do It", we now have the impish "Boogie Dog" residing in our home. This infamous creature was responsible for spilling the dog's kibble on the kitchen floor. Look out for this new havoc-wreaking freak. BEWARE!

AHOY!

Birthdays are nature's way of telling us to eat more cake. ~ unknown

Throughout my life my mom ALWAYS made a big deal about my birthday. Winnie the Pooh theme with handmade burlap ears for all. Major sleepovers. Roller rinks. Even as an adult she continued to do nifty things for my birthday....for years she'd bring doughnuts and milk to my classroom for my students and me. In fact, she unexpectedly died a week before my 30th birthday....with plans for celebration underway. No, I am NOT trying to bring anyone down. I fondly and happily look back at all of those times, knowing that she did it to demonstrate her love for me. I no longer enjoy (nor want) my birthday emphasized. In fact, it saddens me...but I often go through the motions of celebration for my kids....they do not understand why I don't want to celebrate my birthday. On the contrary, however, I LOVE to plan and execute themed birthdays for my kids. Daughter has had a jungle party (complete with hand-made vines that I slaved over for hours), a princess party (with a castle cake), a circus party, and several sleepovers...I think she really loved the spa party last year. At the beginning of October we had Son's Pirate Party. We did pirate make-overs...complete with gear and beards made with the ashes of burned cork. The kids dueled with pretzel sticks. They threw bean bags at the large X I drew on the sidewalk. They ran wildly around the yard searching for the missing presents that were stolen by Captain Blue Devil who left clues around the yard. It was super! Then it was time for the cake. I am not domestic. I am not a great cook (Hubby is in charge of that). Needless to say....I was proud of the cake Hubby and I created. The idea came from the Family Fun website, so I can't even take credit for that, BUT I think we did a super job with the execution. Like Son would say, "Isn't my cake AWESOME?!" HEE HEE.

A Rare Glimpse

While we try to teach our children all about life, our children teach us what life is all about. ~ unknown

We recently purchased a new digital camera. Our old dinosaur was close to extinction and needed to retire. Oh the fun we are having with our new toy. Hubby caught the image of our little ninja at his preschool Costume Parade. When I showed the picture to Son he beamed with pride as he said, "Don't I look AWESOME?!" His self confidence made me chuckle.

I captured the picture of Daughter cheering last weekend. She has always been so shy about "being watched"....never wanting the attention placed on her. She is completely at ease - dare I say wild - with her friends and family and around people she knows (hmm...wonder where that trait comes from). I was flabberghasted that she agreed to do this. I really think she has enjoyed the experience and I think she looks absolutely adorable in her cheer-gear. Anyway....I know I am usually "weird" about posting the kids on the web, but I just couldn't help it today. :0)

Just a Typical Saturday Night

If we couldn't laugh we would all go insane. ~ Jimmy Buffett

In the short time since I blogged the insanity involved in rearing children has become quite apparent. While out and about with Hubby this evening, Daughter was goofing around with some hot peppers that someone had given Hubby. She touched her lips. Yes, they were burning. When he brought her home, she was searching for lip balm. She can NEVER keep track of hers and mine was in the car. She went into the bathroom and came out producing a tube of Preparation H. She asked Hubby if she could put it on her lips. He said that she could not....trying to hold back the laughter. Her argument FOR using it involved the fact that the label said "cooling" on it. I then walked into Son's room. He had oddly gotten ready for bed before being told to do so...a major oddity around here. Needless to say, I needed to investigate to see if there was a particular reason. I found the dirty clothes strewn across the floor....nothing odd about that. They were not wet or exceedingly dirty. Then I spied the large wet spot on the carpet. The 5-year-old lying machine went right to work citing that he had spilled a drink in his room. I did not believe him for a minute. My Mom Instincts had me down on my knees smelling the wet spot....definitely not the smell of Propel. More like urine. Human urine. He finally admitted that he had pulled down his pants and peed on the carpet. We DO have a bathroom with the modern luxury of a flush toilet. Instead, my dear son felt the need to pee on his carpet. Just another Saturday evening of fun at my house. (Hubby is telling his sister the Daughter story right now....unable to hold back his laughter this time. WOOP....there goes the Son story - hee hee).

Get a Room

True love doesn't come to you, it has to be inside you. ~ Julia Roberts

If you don't have anything better to do on a Saturday afternoon, I have just the thing for you. Last weekend I was subjected to the newest and greatest trend ever.....attending a football game for 10-12 year olds so you can draw attention to yourself while passionately kissing and grabbing ass. Apparently this is quite the rage. I was fortunate enough to capture this public display of inappropriate PG-13 action while I was trying to watch Daughter cheer for the football team. They had briefly come up for air when I snapped this image. Go team!

Yes, I'm Gone to Carolina

A silver tear appearing now, I'm cryin', ain't I? I'm gone to Carolina in my mind. ~ James Taylor

Some people say that if they could go back in time to relive a part of their lives, they would go back to high school. Me? I personally wouldn't want to redo any of it. BUT, if I HAD to choose, I would choose college. I loved the time I spent in Chapel Hill and I have my girlfriend to thank for that. My two main "Carolina" friends: Carolina and Ethel are still a major part of my life and I love them to PIECES! I have known each of them over half of the time I have been alive!!! Ethel lives up the street from me. Our lives are so consumed by family, work, and commitments that we hardly ever have time for each other. Carolina has lived in many places (far from where I live) so we keep in touch through the phone and email....and the occasional visits....one of the best being the time that Ethel and I "punked" her and showed up in her condo in Atlanta (LONG story....but in a short version: she thought my brother was coming to stay with her for the weekend and came home to find Ethel and I instead...we HAD to meet the soon-to-be fiance to give our approval - btw: he is now her hubby!). A few weeks ago Carolina was planning to come to NC for a whirlwind visiting trip w/ "L'il Carolina" while Her Man was in the state on business. No brainer here: GIRL VISIT!!! We decided to spend two nights in Chapel Hill...hanging out and getting to meet the new "bebe". It was killing me that L'il Carolina was almost 6 mos. old and I had yet to put my hands on her! We met @ the condo Thursday evening and visited and TALKED (imagine that!) wildly until late...esp. considering that Carolina had only slept three hours since Wed. evening (when she & Her Man & L'il Carolina had left Detroit for their marathon drive to Va. & then spent the day only to head to NC). This is not an astonishing feat considering it is a known fact throughout the universe that exhaustion cannot cease conversation amongst girls...esp. girls who haven't seen each other in about a year and a half. L'il Carolina is even more precious in person as she is in all of her photos! She is absolutely delightful....hardly cries, sleeps well, very content! Carolina is VERY lucky! Ethel and I could not keep our hands off that bundle of smiles!!! We had her at the Cheesecake Factory where we had a fantastic lunch date with Hippie's Chick....whom I always love to see. I am proud to say I am no longer a Cheesecake Factory virgin. L'il Carolina didn't have her ID so she was unable to enjoy the dry martini that her mom ordered for her. Yes, Carolina ordered her a martini b/c she thought the waiter was being a smart ass. Hee hee! After lunch we did a bit of shopping...mainly Ethel and I dumping money into Limited Too! Then it was back to the condo to wallow. Ethel also had to go to the Carolina Brewery to hang some of her awesome photos of Chapel Hill. Hippie's Chick came over that evening to wallow amongst us. We spent the evening watching the DVD's of Carolina's wedding....mainly the uncut footage of the reception. Whew! What a party! The worst part was that we were watching the DVD's on a widescreen TV. Let's just say that it was not flattering....maybe even worse than my driver's license (see the next blog). We were laughing and ragging on ourselves as well as other wedding guests....I possess quite the sharp tongue and can be rather wicked when I get on a roll. I completely forgot that these people that were being "slammed" were friends and family of Carolina and Her Man. She told me later that she told Her Man (who called in the midst of the onslaught) that we were laughing at the DVD's and that I was her "South Park"....nothing is sacred for me. She said it jokingly...but it's true. She also knew that even if it was my family I would be carrying on in the same manner. My sarcastic and cynical comments are not selective....they're issued fairly to all: including myself. We found ourselves up late again. shock...not. Saturday was awesome! Another morning of bagels....this time from Panera (Friday had been Bruegger's). Then, it was off to Kenan for football. We took L'il Carolina to her first Tar Heel football game! OK...so the Heels are suckin' @ football...but there is NOTHING like being lost in a sea of Carolina Blue, listening to the marching band, drinking out of a blue cup, and cheering our old familiar cheers. It was awesome! And even better being with my Carolina Girls...and the newest of the bunch! Even though we lost, it was still spectacular! We took a stroll around campus after the game. The campus is as gorgeous as ever! The grass. The trees. The buildings. Traveling back in time....revisiting all those memories. Ah...UNC. We spent the rest of the afternoon @ the condo, knowing it was just a matter of time before Carolina had to leave for her next destination on her trip. Ethel and I agreed to hang out with L'il Carolina while her mom went to mass. However, the church that Carolina frequented in college (usually right before an evening of fun decadence and indulgence), was no longer in the same spot. Sad how things change. We fed L'il Carolina and helped Carolina pack her MINI VAN (boy are all of us cool - hee hee). Then it was the most dreaded moment of the whole trip...time for them to leave. I tried not to cry, but I just couldn't help it. I could start again...so I won't even go there!!!! Ethel and I went to dinner and then went back to the condo to wallow on the couch in front of the TV. Wow....we're such the party girls. On Sunday we shopped and headed home...arriving in the early evening. I loved spending time with my Carolina Girls. It was over far too quickly. So, when's the next reunion?

Beyond Horrific

Now you know what I have to ask you for. ~ waiter at PF Chang's

Mention a driver's license photo and you are guaranteed to begin a debate about whose is the most wretched. Carolina sparked such a debate on Saturday morning (which is now WEEKENDS ago). We compared. I believe I won. Just the type of contest one wants to win...the Whose Photo Is the Most Disgusting Contest. I had an idea that I would win since I was amazed at how hideous I could appear when I first received the license. I was goofing around with someone else when the photographer took the shot. I was further convinced at the wretchedness of it when I had to present backup identification at an out-of-town branch of my bank because the photo, according to the teller, "really doesn't look like you". This, by the way, is definitely a compliment. During the course of the conversation with Carolina, references were made to Nick Nolte's mug shot. She felt that my photo, although hideous, was not as bad as his merely due to the fact that I did not look menacing....I at least looked like a happy drunkard/drug user. Since the photo was taken, and especially after the comments from the bank teller, I did toy with the idea of having the license redone, but ultimately felt it was a ridiculous expense....who was going to see it anyway? Plus....if they did....it would probably save me from a DUI because I would resemble my photo (I'm saying this as though I make a habit of drunk driving....far from the truth). Well, on the very evening of the day I had this conversation with Carolina, I found out that other people COULD possibly see the picture. Ethel and I went to P.F. Chang's after Carolina left Chapel Hill headed for her next stop on her power-visiting trip. The wait was going to be at least an hour, but we had no place to be and no responsiblities for the evening (how rare is that?!). Needless to say, we bellied up to the bar for a cocktail....I adore their Asian Pear Mojito! Ethel was driving, but opted for one since we would be hangin' out at Chang's for quite some time. We drank our drinks and chatted...which we had not had the opportunity to do in a LONG TIME despite the fact that we live on the same street...how sad! Finally we were seated. At the table I opted for another mojito...Ethel abstained due to the driving thing....she didn't have the drunken license picture to help her out. I was flattered and shocked all at once when Mr. Suave (our waiter) said to me, "Now you know what I have to ask you for." What? I was feeling the first cocktail just a bit and considering the fact that I am on the higher end of thirty-something....I was not exactly sure WHAT was going on. Then flattery struck....I was being carded - woo hoo! I looked young enough to get carded....this is NOT something that happens to me on a daily basis! This feeling of elation was short-lived.....I actually had to share my hideous license with another human being! UGH! Reluctantly, I pulled the license out and hung my head as I handed Mr. Suave the happy-version-of-Nick-Nolte (aka my ID). He made no comment, but brought me my drink....I guess he wanted a good tip. Ethel and I had a big laugh over it. I also called Carolina to share my misfortune with her. I had to leave a voice mail. She called back....I guess during the meal and I didn't hear the phone....she told me that my tale of misery gave her a chuckle....and it probably gave the waiter a good chuckle too. I am now thinking that I really should get the ID redone....it may be frivolous, but that thing is heinous!!!!

On My Mind

Whenever the rainbow appears in the clouds, I will see it and remember the everlasting covenant between God and all living creatures of every kind on the earth. ~ Genesis 9:16

Saturday, September 16 was the third annual Day at the Docks. It is a tradition that was initiated one year after Hurricane Isabel devastated our community. It symbolized the strength of our community and celebrated the progress we had made toward recovery in such a short amount of time. Unfortunately, I had to be in Greenville meeting with one of my grad school professors to discuss my final project. So, I missed it. The second year we had evacuated for Hurricane Ophelia and ended up staying a few extra days with our friends in Smithfield. We DID make it home for the Blessing of the Fleet however. All the boats who choose to participate travel together and dock at one of the local marinas (as you can see in this photo taken from our boat last year...Girlfriend is one of the kids sitting on the bridge of the boat behind us). Being part of the procession is absolutely amazing...all those boats lined up is just awesome. A short, but meaningful, ceremony is held to honor the local fishermen as well as remember those who have passed. In addtion to being a spiritual activity, it is quite a social event for us. (And that's all I'm going to say as far as that goes.) This year we were here for the entire day and boy did we have a blast (again, enough said). The food was delicious (chowder, grilled tuna, shrimp skewers, YUM!!) and the booths and demos were super. The kids fishing contest was stressful, but fun....we had about 6 kids to handle between a few adults. Our crowd didn't win anything, but we were happy with the fact that none of us were hooked. I even baited hooks!!!! The Blessing was as touching as it had been the year before....but the absolute best part was the ride back to our marina. For me it was nothing less than a sign from God. The sky was gray and cloudy. The air was moist and salty. The sun was gorgeous as its flaming glow fell into the briny liquid. Before completely sinking away and casting us into darkness for the evening, a bright rainbow boldly appeared in the sky. For some a coincidence. For me a confirmation.

Birthday Eve

We all have our time machines. Some take us back, they're called memories. Some take us forward, they're called dreams. ~ Jeremy Irons

Although Son and I enjoy Love You Forever and often recite the "I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always, as long as I'm living, my baby you'll be" verse, I know mentall that he is no longer my "baby" in the traditional sense and has not been for some time (my heart....that's a different story). HOWEVER, on the eve of his 5TH BIRTHDAY, it is now even more apparent. Where does the time go? My time machine easily transports me back....his birth, introducing him to Daughter and the rest of the family, illnesses, bumps, bruises, giggles, expressions of joy (on the 4-wheeler, riding a 2-wheeled bike, winning a trophy at the recent fishing tournament, surfing, having the "big kids" acknowledge him), the Hot Diggity Dog song & dance, the Michael Jackson dance, our trip to Baltimore, fits of anger (that make me laugh after the fact). As for traveling forward, I only wish for the best....success, happiness, UNC-CH (aw' c'mon...you KNEW I had to go there!!), and a vast amount of time to add more memories. Happy Birthday, Son!

Shop 'Til You Drop

What is Wal-Mart? Is it, like, they sell wall stuff? ~ Paris Hilton

I composed a magnificent (humble, huh?) blog the other night about my shopping extravaganza with Luscious that took place last Saturday. I typed and typed trying to capture the essence of our excursion...practically succeeding. That's when Son crawled under the desk and pressed the reset button on the surge bar. Not taking time to 'save as draft' every few minutes fearing it would ruin my momentum, my anecdote was GONE. Lost forever as the computer shut down. I am going to attempt to do it again, but I am rather positive that it just won't have the same vibe as the original. Sorry to disappoint if it sucks. I am not checking my spelling or grammar or even rereading!

Weeks ago Luscious and I were discussing the "clothes coupons" we had recently acquired on our separate "back to school shopping" trips. She was in possession of some that were only valid from Sept. 7 -10. Yes, a small window of shopping opportunity, but a window nonetheless. My coupons weren't quite as stringent and weren't even for my own personal shopping...they were for Daughter's favorite clothes shop (Limited Too)....but, hey, shopping is shopping. Luscious and I always have an adventure when we go shopping. For those of you unfamiliar with the remote area in which we live, when we need (yes, NEED) to go shopping, it typically takes us to Nags Head (1hr. away) or to Chesapeake, VA (at least 3 hrs. away). Nags Head has the Wal-Mart and K-Mart and some outlet shops (Gap, Tommy Hilfigger, London Fog, etc.) but for the full mall experience, Virginia is the destination. Our coupons required the full mall experience, dictating a trip to VA. The date, Sat. the 9th, was set weeks ago and we were counting down the days. Planning our itinerary. Planning our meals (yes, this sounds lame, but it is essential when there aren't any Olive Gardens, Chili's, etc. anywhere closer than VA). Then, tragedy struck in the form of Ernesto (hurricane/tropical storm). We missed school the Friday before Labor Day due to the foul weather, but that meant the absolute worst: make up day on our day of shopping. Did that stop us? Not a bit. After the 12:45 dismissal, we prepped our rooms for Monday (which delayed our departure until almost 2) and headed north ("we" being me, Daughter, Luscious, and Little Luscious - 15 yr. old daughter of Luscious - sorry about the lame nickname....I will devise a better, more appropriate one later). Since starvation had come close to taking our lives, we felt the need to stop in Nags Head at the newest addition to the area: a Cold Stone Creamery. I am embarrassed to say that until this jaunt I was a Cold Stone Creamery virgin. Let me tell you how much I LOVED the delicious delight I ordered at the Cold Stone. I had some chocolate concoction (surprise) while Daughter had something called Mint Mint Chocolate Chocolate something or other. As much as I enjoyed mine, I think I will indulge in that minty goodness next time. Not wanting to risk life and limb to eat and drive, we delayed further travel until I was disgustingly full of that chocolatey treat (which was complemented by the waffle bowl). Thank the Lord I don't have to weigh THIS week! We pressed on toward our destination, planning all of our stops. We needed to go to Office Max/Depot (I cannot for the life of me remember which one....but does it really matter?) and TAPS (Teacher and Parent Store) for classroom supplies. We planned on visiting several shops at the mall (Aeropostale, Limited Too, Pearle Vision, Claire's, JCPenny, the standard Asian-run manicure/pedicure shop, KB Toys, NY & Co. as well as anything else that tickled our fancy). Quite a lofty agenda for such a small amount of time....but, hey, a girl can dream. We also knew Wal-Mart was in order for personal needs as well as cheaper classroom needs. Sadly, our late departure (and stops) soon led to shaving our list down a bit. First to go was Pearle Vision. I was supposed to pick up Daughter's spare glasses (no, I did not hinder her visual capability in order to get a pedicure...she is presently wearing her NEW frames and lenses). It was 5-ish when we hit the Office Max/Depot. We were too cheap to buy our classroom supplies there (six date stamps and ink pads were way too much money for our destructive 2nd graders....plus there weren't enough for each of us to get the 6; 6 does seem excessive, but each writing toolbox needs one in accordance with our new writing program). Finally we arrived at the mall. Daughter and I headed straight to Limited Too to sink a small fortune into clothing because I had coupons. What better reason? All the sparkly trinkets work their magic on Daughter....I have to lead her away from all the needless "junk" the store sells in order to get her to select which clothes will satisfy her picky taste in attire. While we were in Limited Too, Luscious and Little Luscious tackled NY & Co and Aeropostale. This brings me to the first question I have for pondering: How did groups of shoppers ever find each other and successfully shop separately prior to cell phones? Although I lived through such an era, I find it quite archaic to even dream of shopping without the cell phone. "Hey, where are you?" "Where to next?" "Meet you there." Well, back to the saga....Since we had more coupons, our next stop was Bath and Body Works. It seemed like a quick trip through the shop...I'm sure if Hubby was there it would have seemed like an eternity to him. I know that Bath and Body Works is listed on his Top Ten Stores I Hate...along with Old Navy and Limited Too. The next major stop was to the Asian-run nail place. Daughter was excited because she was going to get in on the girl action and get her toes painted by a professional for the first time. She didn't want a pedicure or anything quite like that...just her nails painted with some cute designs. OOPS! Back up a sec...prior to going to the shop, we went to buy new nail polish to take with us to the nail shop so we would be able to match our colors when we chipped our nails at home. Thus, question two: Shouldn't there be some kind of discount at the nail place when you take your own polish? Especially when you practically have to physically engage someone violently to get it back? Luscious, Little Luscious, and I were all enjoying our foot soak when the meanest tech in the place came to get Daughter. As they walked by I reminded Daughter to tell the tech that she wanted fancy lines, too. Well, as it turned out, since I hadn't specifically written "fancy design" next to her name when I signed her in, the meanie wouldn't do the fancy nails....deflating Daughter's grand illusion of what it would be like to get her nails done with the rest of us. Since she IS my daughter, she became angry, lashing out with her wicked tongue (after we left thankfully). We didn't quite understand because Little Luscious (who did not write "fancy toes" next to her name) was able to get the fancy polish. The Mean One also put Daughter's polish back on the store's rack so we had to hunt it down and reclaim it (I had to dig mine out from a pile of polish next to my foot spa station). Daughter went from happiness and joy to foul and nasty in a mere 0.1 seconds. It was suddenly the worst day of her life...yes, these words came out of her dramatic mouth. The fact that the mall was closing without a visit to Claire's, KB Toys, or the pet shop didn't do much to help the situation. It was now almost 10 pm and it was time for dinner. Daughter protested with word and deed (she has quite the serious pout) about our choice of Olive Garden for dinner. However, by the time we got inside and ordered, she was euphoric. Was this mood swing hormonal? I was flabberghasted. We all ate and laughed. Luscious and I felt pretty sick after our meals...The Cult (Weight Watchers) has really affected the quantities of food we are now able to eat. I know it's a good thing overall, but I miss the days when we could eat forever. Finally, well after 10 pm, it was time for Wal-Mart. I was unimpressed with this Wal-Mart. I'm sure the fact that it was so late helped detract from the ambiance further. Believe it or not, we actually heard an announcement that it was against the rules to play football in the store. We think we saw the alleged players....we saw 20-somethings racing motorized carts shortly thereafter. Who would have thought we would be able to shop and witness sporting events in the Wal-Mart at that time of night. Since the events of the night are now kind of foggy (it was a few weeks ago), I don't know how long we actually wandered through the joint or really even all the stuff we looked at, but it was after midnight when we finally left the Wal-Mart. Are you doing the math? I still had a 3 hr. drive to get to my cozy bed! I am notoriously bad about putting gas in my car. (Knocking on wood) I have never run out, but I know it's my destiny since I cut it so close. Here I am after midnight knowing that I cannot get home without gas. Yes, I could always use my credit card, but I always have this fear that my card will not work (note that the fear has not forced me to change my ways). I found a place that was open with really cheap gas - score - only to discover that you had to pay first. I HATE THAT! I knew I was filling up and Daughter was starving (how, I don't now) so I presented the guy with a $100...confident that the $50 I had wouldn't cover both gas and snack. He gave me such a happy look. I pumped....leaving Daughter in the store to forage....and then got my change and headed south. Poor Luscious, suffering from the 1st cold of the year after spending a short amount of time with the germ spreaders at school, felt terrible! Bringing me to another question: What kind of world are we living in when we cannot pay for gas AFTER pumping and we can't buy decent over-the-counter cold medicine in Wal-Mart after the pharmacy is closed?! Have you tried to buy cold medicine lately? Thanks to the kids hopped up on methamphetamine, you have to get a card for your medicine (similar to those needed when making a big purchase at Toys-R-Us) and take it to the pharmacy to get your meds. If you are sick and need medicine after the pharmacy is closed, you are SOL. ANYHOW, it was after 2:30 when I dropped her off at her house....leaving me with the last 40-45 minutes alone with a sleeping child and my XM. Oh! I forgot one of the biggies! Before we went into the mall, Luscious discovered that the sticker on my license plate had expired in March. I am oh-so-thankful that I never got pulled or got entangled in a license check. Did I stress about it? DUH! Stress isn't my middle name....it's the first! I finally arrived home around 3:30 and went directly to bed. I slept until 8 or 9, skipped church, and even took a nap from 1 to 3 (so unlike me in my present life). Since we'd had the fortune of Saturday school, Sunday was my only day off and instead of using it for sunning myself at the beach, I spent it in my pj's napping away the exhaustion of my shopping trip. As always, it was another long, BUT FUN shopping trip with Luscious.

OK, definitely not as much humor as the original story (ruined by Son), but it's done and I have posted. I figured I needed to get something out there since I have had a formal complaint lodged against me....tee hee.

Woo Yeah!

I like the Whopper, BEEP the Big Mac. ~ Rob Base

One of my favorite '80's songs is It Takes Two by Rob Base. It not only sounds good, but it is attached to a fabulous memory of an evening (is evening the appropriate word?) spent riding and singing with Carolina and Ethel (are you with me, girls? i'm so glad we got jim home safely - By the way, dear readers, there was no jim with us...it was all a scam we made up as an excuse to be on the Duke campus). I think it was after we went to see the Indigo Girls and the Violent Femmes...I trust Carolina will correct me if I am mistaken. Hearing that song transports me first to the night in Ethel's sedan...all three of sharing the front seat bee-bopping along without a care in the world, still experiencing that euphoria one feels after a concert. It is one of OUR SONGS. When my brother got married I brought the CD in and forced the DJ to play it numerous times as we danced drunkenly about. The "song gods" must have sensed my early morning angst and known how much I needed a boost because I happened across the song on my XM (oh, how I love the XM) on my way to work. I cranked it, more than likely creating hearing loss for Daughter. Sometimes you just have to throw caution to the wind and dance like nobody is watching. :0)

Hi Ho, Hi Ho

One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one's work is terribly important.
–Bertrand Russell

Look out...the breakdown must be imminent! I promptly awoke at 4 AM obsessed with how I was going to fit in everything I need to do today at school. I knew I had to write my parent letter for the week and that my morning planning time would be filled with a team meeting. This notion completely prevented me from going back to sleep. So, what did I do? I gave in to my obsession and answered the call of my dear sweet Dell to compose my letter and email it to school so it would be ready for print. Now it is so close to "alarm time" that it is utterly ridiculous for me to go back to bed. I have already "popped" two Excedrin for a headache that is more than likely due to the stress I have put upon myself already today (either that or it's my ear acting up...it felt kind of odd last night...that's all I need). I am uncomfortable about my day at school because my plans are incomplete....despite the fact that I know that I have last Friday's plans to "go with" and know that I am capable of teaching without explicit plans in front of me. Crap! I just remembered something I left out of my letter! Be right back! There. That's better. For now.

Yesterday I was talking with Carolina. It was wonderful to speak to her. I was sharing with her how I'd been laughing with a friend of mine about how quirky people are (that's the nice way of putting it)....that everyone is "messed up" in some way and in discovering another person's "quirks" is one way to make us feel better about ourselves....our own personal "weirdness" doesn't seem quite so bad. Do you know what...I am so anxiety-filled at this moment that all I can think about is the fact that my alarm is about to go off and I am not near it...I'm going to give in to my OCD and go turn it off before it wakes Hubby...be right back. Whew...mission accomplished with only 7 minutes to spare!! Anyway, back to the random rambling. Carolina and I giggled as we talked about how freakishly anal we had become about certain things....things that never would have bothered us in our college years but would create hives in our present lives. For instance, it was nothing for us to skip a class in undergrad. In fact, we both vividly remember one semester of college where if we ran into each other on campus between classes, it was a rule to just skip the next class. We would have to make sure our paths did NOT cross if we really needed to get to class that day. Some days Carolina would "surprise" me by being seated on the steps outside the building because she knew I'd obey the "rule". Those of you who know me now/met me after college would probably not believe that I could live like that!!! It's just too weird to comprehend! Somehow this freakishness has developed during true adulthood. Carolina summed it up really well....she (and, Carolina, I'm counting on you to make sure I get this right) said that our 30's are a time when we embrace and come face to face with all of our "quirks". I don't think I have quite captured the essence and emotion that went along with the conversation. Carolina, help me out here!!! We each started to share some recent "freak out" stories that we chuckled about. And what did I share? The story of how last week I left a meeting in tears because I was not prepared for the assigned task. One of the group leaders followed me back to my classroom, carrying my books, and spent the next 30-40 minutes with me to "talk me down" and help me begin the task. After the "melt down", I went to Joy's room (I went to her because this is a trait she and I both share....luckily we rarely experience it simultaneously and can laugh about it together - the day we DO share it together will most certainly trigger an apocalyptic reaction of epic proportions) where we laughed about it. Yes, the 30's is definitely a time where we can look at our "quirks". I can't say I enjoy them, but after the initial anxiety wears off, I can look at them and laugh at them knowing that they are just part of who I am. Well, it's officially time to start my day. I am NOW ready to go back to sleep, but that is not an option. Blah. It's even raining. So much for a good hair day. At least I selected a "sunny" outfit for today. I love this cute little outfit....it's so preppie: pink plaid bermudas and a pink collared shirt which can be topped with a pink v-neck sweater AND completed with a sassy pair of pink flip flops (with little wooden heels). I must go, but before I do I will leave with one "deep thoughts invoking" question: Was it just me or was I the only one excited about the "preppie 80's" comeback only to have my happiness subtly ended when the trend was traumatically shortened by the entrance of the "flashdance 80's"? Leggings and bubble skirts? Tight, straight-leg jeans? Discuss amongst y'selves (said in the voice of Mike Meyers as the Jewish woman on SNL).