"People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. When
you figure out which one it is, you will know what to do for each
person."~ unknown
Once again I have checked in on this blog to find that it has been an incredible amount of time since I posted. It may be that I have been using my Facebook to release my written ramblings. Once again I am compelled to write, but am wary of using FB as my platform. Perhaps I should be wary of this as well, but only a few people know of this one and, due to my absence, probably aren't even reading this any longer. So, hey, I'm on here for now or at least until I figure out where the proper forum for me is.
I selected the title and quote for this because I've been reflecting on myself as a friend lately. What I have concluded is that I'm the friend that provides the comic relief. When things get serious, I am the one that is driven to find the comedy in the situation or link the situation to something that will lighten the mood. I am there for my friends, but desperately need to find something to bring about laughter. It may be inappropriate, but that is the service I provide. I can be serious, but even while being serious, I ultimately HAVE to relate to something comedic. It's my survival mechanism I guess.
Due to an onslaught of negative news lately, I have been trying to find humor as well as a way to use humor to brighten someone's spirits and to keep me from sinking into a personal abyss of sadness. For me to be excessively morose is not how I work nor is it what I think my friends expect from me. I will be the one to enhance the inappropriate to make others laugh and smile. To alter my role would not fulfill my typical role. The only thing I have succeeded in is becoming reclusive, spending time alone with my own thoughts and trying to muster up the strength to be a supportive friend. I have found few solutions and a heightened level of stress.
I apologize for the "stream of consciousness" rambling, but I am searching for a solution to a dilemma.
When I end up publishing my thoughts in writing on FB, I am often told that I should write a book. People seem to enjoy the insane things I write. I would love to write, but what in the hell would I actually publish? My best writings start out small inside my soul and build until I finally find the words and organize them and set them free. I never know when the mood will hit or what will result. It's done through sheer compulsion. It is never done out of duty. My kind of writing is not something that would result in a novel. I could not meet a deadline with quality work because I must FEEL it and write it as it comes. So, that leaves me to do it without financial compensation, but a retention of my sanity...which I guess is a definite plus. Today I was hit with the notion of sharing something daily that I find humorous or ridiculous so I can uplift myself and anyone who decides to read it. I want to focus on the fun in life and the comedy that can be found to lighten most situations. I want to bring joy to someone for a moment in a genuinely unhappy situation. I haven't quite figured out HOW to accomplish this. I don't want it to be out there for everyone on FB (who would probably judge me and have me committed), but I also want to reach my "lifetime" friends who can use a dose of comedic medicine. Should I use THIS blog or create another and only share the address with a few? So much to figure out. Anyway, mulling this over and putting it out into the world so maybe, just maybe, I can settle on a solution that satisfies my plagued mind.
OK, so this is not one of my best writings, but it has purged the need to express myself. Has it reduced my inner turmoil? Not really. Well, it was worth a try. Maybe the effect will hit later.
Monday, July 29, 2013
Tuesday, November 20, 2012
The Vent? The Rant? Not Now...
"You must stay drunk on writing so reality cannot destroy you "
~Ray Bradbury
Wow! Has it really been THAT long since I have written on here? It is hard to believe that something I so passionately and frequently used at one point in my life has now become something so foreign. Thanks to my friend Shay (who posted the quote for this entry on my Facebook wall), my drive to write on here today must be somehow related to a fear of reality destroying me...figuratively more-so than literally. I tend to perseverate on things when I am stressed or worried...I am consumed to the point of not being able to sleep. Sometimes writing helps. This morning I awoke with a NEED to write about the particular stress-invoker of the last week. Unfortunately, I did not have the time to "write it out" because I had to leave for work. Fortunately, being at school today was delightful and distracted me. Now, I am much calmer and not feeling the passion for composing the crazed social commentary I was about to unleash. So, for now, I am not going to attempt it. It will not live up to what I had hoped so I am not going to attempt it.
~Ray Bradbury
Wow! Has it really been THAT long since I have written on here? It is hard to believe that something I so passionately and frequently used at one point in my life has now become something so foreign. Thanks to my friend Shay (who posted the quote for this entry on my Facebook wall), my drive to write on here today must be somehow related to a fear of reality destroying me...figuratively more-so than literally. I tend to perseverate on things when I am stressed or worried...I am consumed to the point of not being able to sleep. Sometimes writing helps. This morning I awoke with a NEED to write about the particular stress-invoker of the last week. Unfortunately, I did not have the time to "write it out" because I had to leave for work. Fortunately, being at school today was delightful and distracted me. Now, I am much calmer and not feeling the passion for composing the crazed social commentary I was about to unleash. So, for now, I am not going to attempt it. It will not live up to what I had hoped so I am not going to attempt it.
Saturday, April 02, 2011
Not Feelin' It
We're not worthy!!! ~ Wayne and Garth
OK...here's the situation...I have been honored with a county teaching distinction and have to apply to go further in this thing. I am having an incredibly hard time composing the narratives for the application. Each time I look at the questions that I have to answer and make myself look worthy of the present distinction and even more attractive to the next group of people, I am drawing a blank. The stuff I have is lousy and I cannot think of things to add to bolster it. If it was a distinction for another area, I could go to town on it...but I honestly don't think that this is an area where I truly shine. I don't feel as passionately about it as I do other areas. I'm not even on the curriculum committee for this area. Oh, well. Maybe I can at least make this an opportunity to work harder in this area. BLAH!!!!!!!!!!! I think I'll do the best I can and then take it to some colleagues to help me...maybe they see something else that I don't. :(
OK...here's the situation...I have been honored with a county teaching distinction and have to apply to go further in this thing. I am having an incredibly hard time composing the narratives for the application. Each time I look at the questions that I have to answer and make myself look worthy of the present distinction and even more attractive to the next group of people, I am drawing a blank. The stuff I have is lousy and I cannot think of things to add to bolster it. If it was a distinction for another area, I could go to town on it...but I honestly don't think that this is an area where I truly shine. I don't feel as passionately about it as I do other areas. I'm not even on the curriculum committee for this area. Oh, well. Maybe I can at least make this an opportunity to work harder in this area. BLAH!!!!!!!!!!! I think I'll do the best I can and then take it to some colleagues to help me...maybe they see something else that I don't. :(
Sunday, February 13, 2011
Roast?
Roast: informal...to ridicule or criticize harshly...a facetious tribute, as at a banquet, in which the honoree is alternately praised and insulted~the freedictionary.com
Which definition is the most accurate? You be the judge!
Thank you for allowing me the distinct pleasure of being a part of this prestigious event. What a fabulous opportunity to reunite our honoree with a secret guest from his past (reveal box). Eight years ago I agreed to reveal to our guest of honor how I came to acquire this fine piece of craftsmanship. Until now, I had not kept up my part of the bargain. After hearing about this, I immediately knew that there was no better way to honor both the guest of honor and my secret. After wondering where the contents of this box were for 2 years, thinking it was somehow MY fault that they had not materialized, MY family (also known as Hubby's family), knowing my heartache over not knowing where the contents of this box was, made it their personal goal to put an end to my suffering. The contents of this box were sitting on a shelf at the funeral home. With the help of some amazing people, the balance of the bill was handled and I was finally at peace having possession of her remains, knowing that she was finally being honored in a respectful way. (Look at honoree) Did you ever wonder where she was or why the bills stopped coming? (Look at new one) My advice to you? Make sure your affairs are in order so this fate doesn't fall upon you...unless an eternity of sitting in a plastic bag on a shelf sounds enticing to you. LAUGHTER Now that I have your attention, I'd also like to take a moment to introduce you to your grandchildren...these are the children who live here year-round...they, like the grandchildren that visit a few times per year, like to go to the beach and go fishing. And now that you have a few moments to relax, and I have taken a considerable shorter amount of time than alotted, I hope you enjoy listening to one of the selections your granddaughter played in the all-district band...I know finding 8 minutes in your busy life to merely listen to the performance is extremely difficult. Don't worry...I wouldn't dream of making you listen to the other 3 selections. LEAVE THE BUILDING
Which definition is the most accurate? You be the judge!
Thank you for allowing me the distinct pleasure of being a part of this prestigious event. What a fabulous opportunity to reunite our honoree with a secret guest from his past (reveal box). Eight years ago I agreed to reveal to our guest of honor how I came to acquire this fine piece of craftsmanship. Until now, I had not kept up my part of the bargain. After hearing about this, I immediately knew that there was no better way to honor both the guest of honor and my secret. After wondering where the contents of this box were for 2 years, thinking it was somehow MY fault that they had not materialized, MY family (also known as Hubby's family), knowing my heartache over not knowing where the contents of this box was, made it their personal goal to put an end to my suffering. The contents of this box were sitting on a shelf at the funeral home. With the help of some amazing people, the balance of the bill was handled and I was finally at peace having possession of her remains, knowing that she was finally being honored in a respectful way. (Look at honoree) Did you ever wonder where she was or why the bills stopped coming? (Look at new one) My advice to you? Make sure your affairs are in order so this fate doesn't fall upon you...unless an eternity of sitting in a plastic bag on a shelf sounds enticing to you. LAUGHTER Now that I have your attention, I'd also like to take a moment to introduce you to your grandchildren...these are the children who live here year-round...they, like the grandchildren that visit a few times per year, like to go to the beach and go fishing. And now that you have a few moments to relax, and I have taken a considerable shorter amount of time than alotted, I hope you enjoy listening to one of the selections your granddaughter played in the all-district band...I know finding 8 minutes in your busy life to merely listen to the performance is extremely difficult. Don't worry...I wouldn't dream of making you listen to the other 3 selections. LEAVE THE BUILDING
Thursday, February 10, 2011
This is Why You Suck
I'm a Tar Heel born, I'm a Tar Heel bred.
And when I die, I'm a Tar Heel dead.
So it's rah-rah, Car'lina-'lina!
Rah-rah, Car'lina-'lina!
Rah-rah, Car'lina-'lina!
GO TO HELL, DUKE!
To my Duke friends who respectfully engage in the rivalry, please know this is not directed toward you...basically, THIS particular rant is the result of one Duke fan who would be an embarrassment to have representing either camp. Years ago Luscious and I (both Carolina fans) celebrated the rivalry and engaged in all sorts of infantile antics with our former assistant principal, Lloyd. He is a Duke fan, proudly displaying that fact by hanging a Duke pennant in his office. Luscious and I snuck in there one day and childishly covered the "D" with a "P". We would enter our classrooms to find articles or quotes on our chalkboards (yes, dating myself by mentioning a CHALKboard). Healthy, fun-filled celebration of the rivalry. Sometimes we would get the students involved...but nothing nasty. I remember doing some craft project in Luscious's classroom and the kids had a choice between yarn colors...of course we joked about the Carolina Blue yarn being the best (and considering we were dealing with 6 and 7 yr. olds, most of them agreed with us). Yes, we got the kids a bit riled up and it was, to a degree, a bit of brainwashing...but harmless non-the-less. Working with us was Spring. She is a Duke fan. The yarn thing and the kids cheering for UNC was clearly displeasing to her. I'm not sure exactly what basketball season it was...somewhere in the mid-to-late 90's...the joking got pretty heated...BUT IN COMPLETE, MUTUALLY UNDERSTOOD, GOOD-NATURED FUN. Luscious and I would devise ways to jab at Lloyd and he would devise ways to jab at us...it made the workplace fun. I'm always up for SOME kind of infantile antics. Well, I don't exactly know why, but Spring got terribly nasty about the whole thing...telling us that we needed to stop before someone got their feelings hurt. Luscious, Lloyd, and I KNEW it was all fun and games...ridiculous amusement among ourselves. Other than an occasional verbal quip, we did not deface any of her things. It was not all one-sided either...she made remarks as well. However, the antics were mainly between Luscious, Lloyd, and me. One day she REALLY got ill about the situation. Her nastiness led to the end of our joy. It was no longer fun to receive the anti-Carolina propaganda knowing that there would be a pout and/or lecture from her. We basically told Lloyd that we had to cease and desist because Spring was making it so miserable for us EVEN WHEN WE WERE LAUGHING about receiving anti-Carolina material. It was a healthy, jovial exchange BUT THEN SOMEONE HAD TO RUIN IT!!! Although it never did entirely end, it just wasn't the same. Having to hide our antics and verbal exchanges from Spring took the fun out of it. Even in later years, it never reached the frenzy it had been...it was the end of an era. What I find completely annoying about the situation TO THIS DAY is that whenever it works in HER favor, Spring goes out of her way to rub Duke in my face. After her childish tantrum, I NEVER again mentioned Carolina/Duke to her. Not to say I haven't refuted a comment or retaliated with a snippy remark, but NOTHING compared to what I COULD be doing or saying. AND I never initiate an attack. To this day I swear it was jealousy over being left out of the juvenile antics that incited her fit, but I truly do not care what prompted it. What irritates me now is that she is the one that STILL dishes it out...even though SHE was the one who put an end to it. So, once again making what COULD have been a short story into a long one, I was COMPLETELY pissed off this morning when I checked my Facebook to see that she had posted on one of my comments. I wrote as my status:
And when I die, I'm a Tar Heel dead.
So it's rah-rah, Car'lina-'lina!
Rah-rah, Car'lina-'lina!
Rah-rah, Car'lina-'lina!
GO TO HELL, DUKE!
To my Duke friends who respectfully engage in the rivalry, please know this is not directed toward you...basically, THIS particular rant is the result of one Duke fan who would be an embarrassment to have representing either camp. Years ago Luscious and I (both Carolina fans) celebrated the rivalry and engaged in all sorts of infantile antics with our former assistant principal, Lloyd. He is a Duke fan, proudly displaying that fact by hanging a Duke pennant in his office. Luscious and I snuck in there one day and childishly covered the "D" with a "P". We would enter our classrooms to find articles or quotes on our chalkboards (yes, dating myself by mentioning a CHALKboard). Healthy, fun-filled celebration of the rivalry. Sometimes we would get the students involved...but nothing nasty. I remember doing some craft project in Luscious's classroom and the kids had a choice between yarn colors...of course we joked about the Carolina Blue yarn being the best (and considering we were dealing with 6 and 7 yr. olds, most of them agreed with us). Yes, we got the kids a bit riled up and it was, to a degree, a bit of brainwashing...but harmless non-the-less. Working with us was Spring. She is a Duke fan. The yarn thing and the kids cheering for UNC was clearly displeasing to her. I'm not sure exactly what basketball season it was...somewhere in the mid-to-late 90's...the joking got pretty heated...BUT IN COMPLETE, MUTUALLY UNDERSTOOD, GOOD-NATURED FUN. Luscious and I would devise ways to jab at Lloyd and he would devise ways to jab at us...it made the workplace fun. I'm always up for SOME kind of infantile antics. Well, I don't exactly know why, but Spring got terribly nasty about the whole thing...telling us that we needed to stop before someone got their feelings hurt. Luscious, Lloyd, and I KNEW it was all fun and games...ridiculous amusement among ourselves. Other than an occasional verbal quip, we did not deface any of her things. It was not all one-sided either...she made remarks as well. However, the antics were mainly between Luscious, Lloyd, and me. One day she REALLY got ill about the situation. Her nastiness led to the end of our joy. It was no longer fun to receive the anti-Carolina propaganda knowing that there would be a pout and/or lecture from her. We basically told Lloyd that we had to cease and desist because Spring was making it so miserable for us EVEN WHEN WE WERE LAUGHING about receiving anti-Carolina material. It was a healthy, jovial exchange BUT THEN SOMEONE HAD TO RUIN IT!!! Although it never did entirely end, it just wasn't the same. Having to hide our antics and verbal exchanges from Spring took the fun out of it. Even in later years, it never reached the frenzy it had been...it was the end of an era. What I find completely annoying about the situation TO THIS DAY is that whenever it works in HER favor, Spring goes out of her way to rub Duke in my face. After her childish tantrum, I NEVER again mentioned Carolina/Duke to her. Not to say I haven't refuted a comment or retaliated with a snippy remark, but NOTHING compared to what I COULD be doing or saying. AND I never initiate an attack. To this day I swear it was jealousy over being left out of the juvenile antics that incited her fit, but I truly do not care what prompted it. What irritates me now is that she is the one that STILL dishes it out...even though SHE was the one who put an end to it. So, once again making what COULD have been a short story into a long one, I was COMPLETELY pissed off this morning when I checked my Facebook to see that she had posted on one of my comments. I wrote as my status:
I am familiar enough with the rivalry to know that anything one says or does can easily turn around and bite you in the ass (case in point: last night). Yes, this was an anti-Duke sentiment, but veiled...well, until I added a brief explanation to a co-worker who wondered to whom I was directing my comment. Spring wrote, in response to the above post, "WooHoo! Go Duke!" Now, I am NOT saying I didn't deserve some comment, BUT the fact that SHE did it after the bitch-fit from the 90's INFURIATES ME!!!!!!! Either let the game proceed or don't participate at all. DON'T rub my nose in it unless you are willing to receive some smack as well. Wonder what she'll think when she sees my response to her comment: "EFFFFF DUKE....ALL DAY EVERY DAY!!!!!!!!!! BTW, Spring, I find it quite comical how you take the time to personally post on MY wall when it turns out in your favor. I recall you specifically telling us to stop when we celebrated the rivalry years ago...thanks for reaffirming my dedication to my team and confirming my beliefs about certain opposing fans...". Respect the rules of engagement or face the consequences.
Tuesday, February 08, 2011
Where I Come From....
"That's where I come from, Where I'll be when it's said and done, Well I'm proud as anyone, That's where I come from..."~Kenny Chesney
Where I come from is NOT perfect. It is an isolated strip of sand off the coast of North Carolina. The closest Walmart is over one hour away. The economy is dependent upon the tourism business. When the national economy is bad, our economy is horrendous. Other than Subway, it's an hour to get to any fast food. The winters are desolate and often dreary and cold. The wind howls practically all year. The roads can be flooded with briny water either from the ocean or sound at any time. Most businesses close during the winter. Hurricanes are a constant threat. Drama is abundant, as it is EVERYWHERE (those who don't believe that are fooling themselves). However, it is one of the most beautiful places on Earth! The sunsets are breathtaking! The wildlife is amazing. Dolphins jumping and frolicking off the beach even during the coldest, nastiest days confirms my belief in God. I LOVE living here! It's not for everyone. I believe it takes a certain type of person to happily live here. The desolation is soothing and is a perfect compliment to the crazy pace of summer when all the tourists are here. Knowing I can let my children go anywhere in the village safely is comforting. Anyway, I could babble on for pages about why I love where I live...but that is not getting me to my point: if you don't like it here, MOVE! Highway 12 DOES run north. Those of you who detest being here, and feel the need to constantly bash the lifestyle here, GET THE HELL OUT! Please relieve your own displeasure and stop contributing to ours (referring to those of us who like being here). Quit bitching and do something to remedy your situation. If you hate the school, quit bitching about it on Facebook and take your kids somewhere else (complaining about trail mix...REALLY?!). If you hate the drama, go live in a cave (because drama is everywhere). If you hate the economy, go somewhere that can provide you with a job. This is how the world works here, love it or leave it! Hmmm....didn't realize how angry all those FB posts were making me...ha ha!
Where I come from is NOT perfect. It is an isolated strip of sand off the coast of North Carolina. The closest Walmart is over one hour away. The economy is dependent upon the tourism business. When the national economy is bad, our economy is horrendous. Other than Subway, it's an hour to get to any fast food. The winters are desolate and often dreary and cold. The wind howls practically all year. The roads can be flooded with briny water either from the ocean or sound at any time. Most businesses close during the winter. Hurricanes are a constant threat. Drama is abundant, as it is EVERYWHERE (those who don't believe that are fooling themselves). However, it is one of the most beautiful places on Earth! The sunsets are breathtaking! The wildlife is amazing. Dolphins jumping and frolicking off the beach even during the coldest, nastiest days confirms my belief in God. I LOVE living here! It's not for everyone. I believe it takes a certain type of person to happily live here. The desolation is soothing and is a perfect compliment to the crazy pace of summer when all the tourists are here. Knowing I can let my children go anywhere in the village safely is comforting. Anyway, I could babble on for pages about why I love where I live...but that is not getting me to my point: if you don't like it here, MOVE! Highway 12 DOES run north. Those of you who detest being here, and feel the need to constantly bash the lifestyle here, GET THE HELL OUT! Please relieve your own displeasure and stop contributing to ours (referring to those of us who like being here). Quit bitching and do something to remedy your situation. If you hate the school, quit bitching about it on Facebook and take your kids somewhere else (complaining about trail mix...REALLY?!). If you hate the drama, go live in a cave (because drama is everywhere). If you hate the economy, go somewhere that can provide you with a job. This is how the world works here, love it or leave it! Hmmm....didn't realize how angry all those FB posts were making me...ha ha!
Saturday, January 29, 2011
Ode to Hubby
Writing is no trouble: you just jot down ideas as they occur to you. ~ Stephen Leacock
Hubby read my posts about the kids. He requested that if I ever wrote about him, could I please wrap it up in a few sentences. My response? SURE! So, basically, I LOVE HIM! DONE! :)
Hubby read my posts about the kids. He requested that if I ever wrote about him, could I please wrap it up in a few sentences. My response? SURE! So, basically, I LOVE HIM! DONE! :)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)